A 16-year-old Aussie-American boy recalls his traumatic childhood experience of being raised as a girl and forced to wear dresses and make up by his mother.
Lucas was only 8 when his mother dressed him in girl’s clothes and sent him to school. “I didn’t know who I was,” he told us in this heartbreaking email.
“I have sent this story to many websites and none of them have published it. I feel like I need to share this especially after learning about Desmond. I think our experiences could be very similar, and hopefully this could help some people are going through the same thing,” wrote Lucas.
Desmond “Desi” Napoles, 12, is a child drag performer, fashion model, actor, and LGBTQ activist, known by the stage name Desmond is Amazing. According to his parents, he’s been into drags since he was only 2-years-old.
16-year-old boy who was forced trans hopes message helps others. Parents say trans drag boy “Desmond is Amazing” was not forced into it.
Lucas was born in Western Australia.”My parents met online on some, now defunct, dating website. My father is an Australian labour worker and my mother was working as a waitress in Los Angeles, California, at the time,” his email explains.
His mother was an aspring actress whose career wasn’t exactly taking off. She got several roles as an extra, and a few parts in some low budget indie films, most of her income came from tips she earned for waiting tables at a diner on the boulevard.
She met his father on an online dating site. They’d been talking on MSN for 6 months before his dad decided to help her get a ticket to come to Australia. They got married and had one child; Lucas.
“I grew up and went to school in Australia and everything was quite normal. I had a few friend and we’d hang out and play video-games or just mess around at the local part.”
“I even remember being so upset when I found out that my best friend and I weren’t going to the same primary school. It was just year one but I do remember being upset and bored during recess because I didn’t have my friend to play with. It took me a few weeks before I got over it and starting making new friends.”
Lucas says that he wasn’t aware that his parents were fighting and it took him by surprise when they split. She took him back to America where he would live with his mother and his grandparents until she could afford to rent a place of her own.
The 16-year-old boy who was forced to act trans by his mother added: “It sucked. I was pulled out of school and was taken to a strange country where I had no friends. I wasn’t even allowed to talk to my dad. My mum didn’t even enrol me in school until I was 10… I had been living in America since I was 7!”
Lucas was told terrible things about his dad. How he basically abducted his mother and held her captive in Australia for 8 years. Words like sexist, redneck, and rapist were often used to describe him.
“I don’t remember him being any of these things but hearing my grandma and mum talk about him like that made me hate him. They had painted an image of a monster and, for the longest time, I believed he was.”
It was in 2014, Lucas was only 9-years-old, when his mother started putting make up on him and dressing him in dresses.
“My mum would make me binge watch RuPaul’s Drag Race with her like all the time. Then one day she turned to me in the middle of an episode and told me that I’m special and not like the other kids. She asked if I identify more like her or like my dad… and from all of the terrible things I’d heard her say about my dad, I just responded, ‘like you, mum.'”
Trans boy story: 16-year-old boy recalls his mum forcing him to watch RuPaul’s Drag Race and making him trans.
It was at this point when his mother went into his room and pulled out all of his clothes. She scattered them all over the living room floor and said: “Look. Doesn’t this just seem wrong. This isn’t you, Lucy.”
“I was a bit confused. I didn’t know any Lucy. I actually didn’t really know many kids my age because mum hadn’t enrolled me in school yet. It took me a bit to figure out that I was Lucy, or at least that was the name my mum had given me.”
Lucas’s mother told him that they needed to get rid of all the ‘toxic items’ in his life and claimed that the only reason he thought he was a boy was because of his father’s manipulative influence.
“She made me grow my hair out. She put make up on me and put me in dresses. She called me Lucy. She was my mother, so I just believed her. I think she noticed that I was still confused because I didn’t act the way she wanted, so she’d just say ‘do like the do on the show [RuPaul’s Drag Race].”
His mother covered him in glitter make up, and made him wear fishnet leggings with a shiny hot-pink dress and a matching bow tie in his hair. “It didn’t feel I was going to school, it felt like I was going for an audition,” Lucas expressed.
“I was a star, or least I felt like it. The teachers absolutely adored me and used me as an example all the time. I got special treatment. I could never do any wrong. The other boys in my class didn’t bully me or anything. I guess I really enjoyed the attention so I started to embrace it and play it up a bit.”
Teachers grant special privileges for trans kids. 16-year-old boy who was forced trans girl says he got ‘special treatment’ as per his trans boy story.
According to Lucas his mother was enjoying the attention just as much as he was. She’d be invited to special events to talk about ‘raising trans kids’ and things like that. She even gave an interview to a popular news magazine where she discussed the abuse they allegedly suffered through with her Australian ex-husband.
“I remember reading the article and thinking it was all a load of crap. She said my dad beat me and called me homophobic slurs. I asked my mum about this and she kept insisting that it happened and that I just don’t remember it because I was traumatised. It never happened, though.”
In the email Lucas claims that from the age of 11 to 14 his mother would take him to parties and other social events where there would intoxicated adults.
“She took me to a high-end club that was filled with men who were practically nude. They’d have stage shows where the guys would dance promiscuously and strip. A lot of these guys would always say nasty things to me and touch me inappropriately. I didn’t like it, I told my mum yet she didn’t care. She told me to ‘man up’, which I thought was very ironic.”
Lucas was pressured to take the stage and dance erotically in front of a lot of man. “I didn’t know what to do, so I just copied the other dancers and also did what I saw on RuPaul’s Drag Race,” said Lucas.
At the end of the night Lucas’s mother was approached by a man who propositioned her. He gave her a card and said that he’d “absolutely love to get to know Lucas a bit better.”
“My mother wanted me to go visit him… ALONE! She told me she’d already set up a date for the two us and said it would be fun. ‘It’s just two queens going shopping and having fun, Lucy. Don’t be such a baby,’ she said. I refused. I cried. I screamed.”
It was around this time that Lucas started to reject his new identity. He’d be more resistant and stubborn and would tell his mum that he didn’t really want to wear a dress to school.
“I felt emotionally manipulated into doing it. If I’d refuse my mum would cry and say that I reminded her of my dad. So, I continued doing it but I’d wash the make up off my face in the school bathroom the second I got there. My mum saw this and she’d also make an issue of it.”
The biggest turning point for Lucas was the way his mother reacted to seeing him flirt with a girl.
Forced trans boy had a crush on girl and played Xbox with her at her house.
“I was 14 and I had a crush on one of my friends from school. We’d talk, a lot. I even told her that the whole dress up thing was my mum’s idea. I was my self around her.”
“I’d go over her place after school sometimes and just hang out. It was great. She would let me borrow her brother’s clothes. Anyway, we’d either play outside in her backyard or just play Minecraft together on her Xbox. I loved it. Reminded me of what life was like in Australia.”
Lucas’s mother thought that the friendship was purely platonic and she was livid when she discovered it wasn’t. One day when she was picking Lucas up from her house she saw the two of them ‘making eyes’ at each other and she snapped.
“I didn’t know what upset her more; that I was play tickling her or the fact I wasn’t wearing a dress. Either way, she wasn’t happy. She didn’t say anything at her house, but she lost it when we were alone in the car together. I got an earful of all the usual stuff: my dad, how men are evil, everything she’d done for me, and her victimhood.”
He told his mum that he loved this girl but she said that he didn’t understand love and that he was only doing this because of societal pressures that are forcing him to ‘act straight’.
“She even showed me homoerotic films and told me that this was natural. Although it may be, it wasn’t for me. But still, I was old enough to realise what was going on. It made me feel sick.”
Lucas refused to wear dresses and put on make up which angered his mother, but, unfortunately, all he had was girl clothes.
“Mum shouted at me, ‘if you’re not going to where the expensive clothes I bought for you, you can buy your own.’ I was 15 and didn’t have a job so I had to wear the girl clothes to school.”
His crush would bring some spare clothes to school so he wouldn’t have to wear a dress. His teachers would pull him aside and lecture him on conforming to gender norms and say that what he was doing was ‘toxic’. “I was shamed by my English teacher. She said I was setting a bad example for other LGBTQ kids,” he explained.
School kids embrace LGBTQ. 16-year-old boy who was forced to be trans says he was accepted by his peers and wasn’t bullied.
“The special treatment was gone but at least I felt like myself again. My English teacher would call me Lucy and I would correct her by saying ‘it’s Lucas, miss.’ She yelled at me in front of the entire classand accused me of misgendering her and something called mansplaining.”
Lucas’s English teacher called his mother who picked him up from school at lunch time. She was furious, Lucas said. She forbid him to see his crush again and pulled him out of school. “While you live in my house, you go by my rules,” she told him.
“Since I wasn’t in school I just looked for work so I could save, buy my own clothes, and eventually rent my own place. I got two jobs; one was at a fast food place and the other was washing dishes at a small restaurant.”
“When I turned 16 I filed for emancipation and moved out. I don’t talk to my mum, but my crush is now my girlfriend.”
Lucas, the 16-year-old boy who was once forced to be trans by his mother, is visiting Perth, Western Australia to see his dad with his girlfriend in December.
Lucas also finally reached out to his dad who told him why they split up.
“My dad was working long hours. He would get up at 4:30AM every morning and not get home until 6:00PM or later on a weekday. Mum worked part-time at a pub close to where I lived but only on the weekends. One weekend when my mum was at work dad found out that she had been sending naughty messages and pictures to some random guys on the internet. He told me that he confronted her about it, and when he did, they got into a big argument and broke up.”
Lucas’s father never struck his ex-wife or his son. He never called his son a homosexual slur, either.
Lucas is planning on visiting his father in Western Australia with his girlfriend for Christmas this year, that is if travel restrictions ease up.
Now 16-year-old Lucas proudly identifies as a boy and says his days of being called Lucy and being forced to be trans are over. He hopes his story helps somebody that may be experiencing the same thing.
He understands that there may be a lot of children who are trans but also believes that there are many children out there that are being forced into being trans by their parents.
What are your thought on Lucas and his shocking story of being forced to be trans, wear make up, dress and act like a girl by his mother? Let us know in the comments below.